Still Holding. . .

OK, Campers. . .  I guess it's been a while since I provided an update.  Two reasons, I guess. . .  One, there really hasn't been too much change.  I'm improving slowly.  Every day is a little better, but so far no quantum leaps.  But, according to my doctors, I'm pretty much on schedule, so I guess I have to be more patient.


And, for the longest time, I've been beastly tired most of the time.  That, too, has been gradually improving.  Mostly the character of the weariness has changed.  At first, it seemed to stem from my body core - I pretty much always felt fatigued and lifeless.  I'm still tired a lot, but it's more of a 'conventional' tired, like after the Sandman makes his visit.


I'll try to be more timely and see if I can't also come up with some words of wisdom. . .  ;-)


Peace and love to all!!
Joe

The Day of Reckoning is Set

OK, Campers.  My appointment is now set for the PET Scan which will tell if my treatments have been successful in eradicating the disease.  I will have the scan on Tuesday, August 19.  Later that day, I will meet with Dr. Caudell, my radiation oncologist, to decode the results.  So, here's keeping my fingers crossed!!


I also had an appointment with the speech pathologist/swallowing specialists yesterday and found out that I have probably slowed down part of my recovery process by making some invalid assumptions.  I figured that one treatment was over and since I was swallowing OK, I could discontinue the swallowing exercises that I had been doing since before treatment began.  Wrong. . . .  I need to still be doing them to work on getting control of my tongue back.,  I just figured that it would be a matter of time, related to when the swelling of my tongue went away.  Oh, eventually, that latter route would have worked, but I can speed up the process by getting back on the exercise regimen.  In my feeble defense, for the first few weeks after treatment ended, I could barely stay awake so getting up the ambition to exercise, hell getting the ambition to do anything, was beyond my capacity.  Yeah, that's my story ad I'm sticking to it.


Hope all is well with all of you!!!


Peace and love to all!!
Joe

And Now for Something Completely Different. . .

OK, Campers.  After a four week routine of essentially watching TV by myself in the mornings, watching movies and other videos with friends in the afternoon, and somewhere along the line running an errand with whoever was here to drive me, I went totally of script today.  It's Saturday and Elaine is not working so I decided we could do something out of the ordinary.   And we did. . .  For no apparent reason other than it's close by, I decided that I wanted to play miniature golf.  So, we went to the local course and had a great time!!!  And I roughed it - no cart.  I walked the entire course.  ;-)  I must admit that I took a nice nap once we got home as the heat and effort did sap me a little more than I expected.


The healing progress continues.  Slow, but it's happening.  I can't get too excited when I notice a vast improvement  in the morning as there will often be a slight backslide the next morning.  But the net result is still a little better every day, and who could ask for more than that?


Peace and love to all!!
Joe

A Bit of a Surprise

Well, Campers, one more time my impatience is revealed.  I'm sitting here thinking that it's taking forever to feel any progress.  But yesterday, I had an appointment with Dr. Russell, my medical oncologist, who informed me that I'm probably about a week ahead of the norm as far as recovery goes.

Just goes to show you that sometimes having an opinion just isn't worth the effort.

Peace and love to all!!
Joe

Keepin' On Keepin' On

OK, Campers.  Week three of post-treatment recovery is in the books.  I'm getting a little better every day, though no miracles.  But, as I keep saying, that's my problem.  Patience never was one of my  virtues. 


What's funny is that the doctors and nurses have been wonderful in setting what should be my expectation level.  My dilemma is that I'm not real good at accepting that level.  C'est la vie. . .


But, when I look objectively, there has been vast improvement.  Like I told Elaine last night, it was only a week and a half or so that I was spewing mucous from every available orifice several times a day.  I don't mean to jinx myself (probably too late. . . ;-), but it has been about a week since Vesuvius erupted.  That alone is worth the price of admission.


Also to the good, I'm eating more 'real' food.  Okay, calling pudding real food is a stretch, but it's something other than a box of Boost VHC (Very High Calorie).  And some sort of breakfast grain cereal is in the mix, occasional pureed meat, and pureed vegetables.  Trying anything more solid than that is still out of the question as my tongue still swells and subsides of it's own volition and I really have no control over it.  Soon, soon, I know. . .  (There's that rare virtue again. . .) 


But the process continues and for that I am grateful!!


Peace and love to all!!!
Joe

I Never Saw It Coming

OK, Campers. I know that I sometimes bandy about the term 'life-changing events' and probably take liberties with what it actually entails. But today I've been thinking about those events which certainly do change the way we live but go a little bit deeper and actually change the core of who we are, of how we see our lives, and how we choose to live those lives from that point forward.

So far, I'm going to say I have experienced two such moments, and one of those is still in progress.  And, yes, both of then involve #$%@& cancer.  The first was 10 years ago when my son David was afflicted and passed on.  That was my first total eye-opener.  Yes, my life was inexorably changed, but the person that I had been also left this plane, leaving me, ultimately, as the best person I have ever been.  I began to value my family and friends more and became less mercenary.  Oh, I certainly care about my career and try to do my meager best, but it is not the focal point of my life. I'm a kinder, gentler person.  I'm more relaxed.  All in all, I'm healthier, happier, and feel good about damn near everything.  It's great being me.  And, anyone out there that doesn't feel that way about their own life ought to be asking why.

So, that brings us to the second moment.  Yeah, I thought I learned it all going though David's bout with the disease.  Boy, was I wrong. . .   ;-)

But, this round is still a work in progress.  I'm not sure where it will lead me and how I will be changed, though I know I will be.  It's sort of funny, but I know that the process has already begun but I still can't focus enough to determine how.  One thing is that I know I will continue to worship Elaine and will do everything I can for her, knowing it will never measure up to all she's done foe me during this long, strange trip.  It will really take a cataclysmic event to upset me.  I will reconsider my retirement plans, and will most likely move my date up a year or so, meaning sometime in 2015.  I will take every day as it comes, appreciating every day I wake up above the grass.  And, I know there will be others.

But then, every day is better than the day before.

Peace and love to all!!!
Joe

Nothing New But Feeling Better

No major breakthroughs today, though I think it is now safe to say that most of the pain in the back of my throat, which had been constant, is now almost gone.  My tongue is still sore swollen and useless, but one thing at a time!!

And I get a bonus this week.  Elaine is working the weekend, so she has today and tomorrow off.  So, I get to see her smiling face all day for the next two days!!!  Life is good!!

Peace and love to all!!
Joe